Uh...

           Gahhh. Okay. I am not one to use my blog as like a vent for me, even though I should because it would probably help me mentally. But I also know that no one likes to sit and read about other people’s problems because everyone has their own problems. Sometimes, though, I just get so frustrated that all I want to do is sit here on my laptop and completely cuss out the people in my life that drive me crazy. For starters, my parents. Oh wait, they are the only ones in my life who truly drive me crazy. And the problem is…I can’t get away from them. I have no choice but to live with them because I’m still just a kid, I can’t move out, I can’t afford to move out and truthfully I don’t want to have to other than the fact that they live here too. And what’s even more frustrating is knowing that I absolutely have to make something of myself in this world so that I don’t end up like them. This may be harsh, but sometimes that’s what people need. I guess in a good way it is a motivator for me to do well in my life so I can provide a better life than they provided me for myself and if I one day have kids. It just sucks that it has to be that way. I know that everyone has problems, some have family problems, some have health problems, some mental problems. Everyone has problems whether they admit to them or not. It’s what you do with what you’re given that defines who you are. And I just don’t want to be that person to let a problem in my life define me in a negative way. I try try TRY my hardest to look at the positives in my life, and I do have a lot of them. I am just sometimes so overwhelmed with the negatives in my life that I let myself slip and start letting those problems define me. I know for sure that all of this built up…whatever it is, will someday hopefully help me positively in my work. Whether that is writing or publishing. Whatever I end up doing I just hope that in the end I not only acknowledge the positives but can some day use the negatives to help guide me in the direction that I know I want to go. And I’m working on that.

          Whew. Now that that is off my chest. We can move on. So. The past few days have been extremely busy, fun, and somewhat stressful. First of all, I got my new tattoo. Did not know if I was actually going to do it, but I sure did. With some help from some great friends. And it looks awesome. I love it. I’m glad I did it. But as far as I’m concerned right now, that will be the last of them. Not because I don’t like tattoos, it’s just that I feel like my body would be too cluttered with stuff. Ya know? I got super sun burned. That’s definitely not a good thing. I’m not aiming to get skin cancer or anything. At least the weather hasn’t been teasing me by being sunny when I can’t go out in it. Thank you weather gods. Also, I started my job at Mackenzie River Pizza. It is definitely overwhelming. I hate not knowing what I am supposed to be doing or not knowing how to do things. I know most people would, but it really is the most helpless feeling in the world. I’m learning, but still just getting the hang of it. I like it, though. I really like all of the people I have met so far. It seems like a fun group of people to work with. So I am excited to get to know them all better. Definitely a little nervous for tomorrow though because the past two days I have worked have been “slow” days, but to be honest, they did not feel so slow to me. Fridays are supposed to be like the busiest day…so I know I’m going to be stressed tomorrow. Hopefully I survive it. You’ll know if I do…or don’t.

          It is way past my bed time now so I think I am going to get some rest. Thankfully I do not have to get up early. Sorry ‘bout the complaining y’all but I had to get it out of me. I’ll try to stay more positive in my future blogs, do not worry J Good night.